Should you Keep Secrets from your Spouse? (#LoveBlog2017 - Linkup & Giveaway) | Enduring All Things

Friday, February 10, 2017

Should you Keep Secrets from your Spouse? (#LoveBlog2017 - Linkup & Giveaway)

Another day, another #LoveBlog2017 challenge that I'm hosting! Today's prompt is "Secrets." Check out Brita's introduction post to see the rules and the prompts for each day.
When I ask myself this question, my first reaction is to say absolutely not! Do not keep secrets from your spouse. Honesty is the best policy. It's the foundation for trust. And trust is necessary for a relationship.

But, are there instances when keeping a secret might actually be beneficial?

Lets look at this.

What about when you're giving your spouse a gift or surprising him in another way? 
Well sure, right? There is no harm in that. The funny part of it is that Pearson cannot do it. I know what he's getting me for Valentine's Day because he just couldn't keep it in anymore.

What about when something happened that he or she wouldn't like, but it wasn't exactly your fault? 
I have an example from show, Parenthood (remember, I'm addicted). Adam works with an attractive, younger woman and he told her, in a fatherly way, that she doesn't have to dress the way she does to get attention because she's smart and has more great qualities than just her looks. She took this the wrong way and kissed him. Adam's wife had just had a baby and he'd just started this new job which was taking all of his attention, so she was already feeling a little insecure.

Adam's brother told him not to tell Kristina because she would stew over this for ever. She would be hurt. She would feel even more intimidated by the other women. She would think about the situation all the time. However, Adam would now have a clear conscience and would go about his life feeling really good about himself. It sounds like a great point, doesn't it?

Well, Adam ended up telling Kristina and it was bad at first. She was crushed. She asked him to fire the coworker (which he didn't and then lied about but that's another story). Everything was a disaster but not for very long. Kristina got over it eventually. She forgave Adam. She forgave the coworker. And the marriage was stronger because of it.

What if you do something to break trust?
I think everyone knows the right answer to this one. We absolutely tell them, right? But let's break it down. If you tell them, yes the trust will be broken. But not as bad as if you don't tell and they find out. Just put yourself in their shoes. If you found out they did what you did, wouldn't it be worse. And trust me, it's going to come out eventually. Especially if you have a guilty conscience about it. Get it out in the open. It will suck at first, at least in my experience, you'll get through it and be stronger than before. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right?

So just be honest. Build the trust. It will pay off in the long run.

What do you think? Are there any instances where it's okay to keep secrets from your spouse?
Join us for today's #LoveBlog2017 challenge below!

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Brita - Blog // Twitter // Instagram // Pinterest // Facebook // Bloglovin
Brita Long is the pink and sparkly personality behind the Christian feminist lifestyle blog, Belle Brita. While her first love will always be Paris, she lives happily with her husband Daniel Fleck in the Atlanta area.
Charlene - Blog // Twitter // Instagram // Pinterest // Facebook // Bloglovin
Charlene is a 20 something wife and fur mamma living in Ohio. She uses her blog, "Enduring All Things" to inspire young wives to keep God first and their husbands second in everything they do.
Tayler - Blog // Twitter // Instagram // Pinterest // Facebook // Bloglovin
Tayler is a motherhood and lifestyle blogger at The Morrell Tale. She loves raising her kids, Rhys (2.5 years old) and Evelyn (1 month old). She also writes about her time as a teacher, her Mormon religion, books she's read, and recipes she and her husband have created.

Meet your sponsor:

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#LoveBlog2017 Giveaway:

The #LoveBlog2017 giveaway starts February 1, 2017 and runs through the end of the month. While we love our international readers, this is limited to US residents only due to legal restrictions. To learn more about all the sponsors, check out Belle Brita all month long!
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